life goes on

a couple things have happened:

i started taking paul sereno's anatomy class and it is pretty awesome. im having a lot of fun. i dropped marine ecology in favor of a fairy tales class and it was a good decision. i was dying of boredom in the marine class.

i did not get a teach for america position, which makes me really sad, but i'm going to apply for a couple other programs because i think i would be a good teacher and it would be a good thing to do for the years between undergrad and grad (and while i figure out what i want to go to grad school for).

I got into a class for next quarter called field ecology which means that i get to go on a field trip to florida for 10 days during spring break. its going to be a lot of fun especially because Erica is going to be taking it as well. i havent ever had a class with her and it is really going to be a lot of fun. especially since there is a field trip involved.

for some odd reason, robins are everywhere around campus, it is really strange. any idea why?

i like star wars, its pretty cool. its good to watch while working (or pretending to) on physics homework. i guess it will have to be done tomorrow afternoon instead... oh well.

i'm writing this from leah's computer and i really like her keyboard, it makes me want to keep typing.

waiting for it all to fall down around me

i feel scared and insecure. but everything is going well. school is going well, i like (most of) my classes, and the one i dont i think i am going to drop anyway because its incredibly boring so far. (marine ecology! who would have thought it would be boring?) my roommates are lovely, i have a bunch of great great friends. frank is good, but busy. i've applied for teach for america and i am really hoping to get in, even if i chose that it is not the right avenue for me and i don't accept, right now i dont know if it is the right path or not. true, i havent unpacked from christmas break yet and some other various loose ends, but i still feel like everything else is just on the verge of collapse. i got pretty mad at a really good friend of mine and although i still think my arguments were valid, i really feel now like i was taking it out on him. i feel like im becoming addicted to caffiene and alcohol and being needed. i need to stop, step back, and try to figure out whats going on here, but i dont think its something i can figure out. my future will not be decided by my thinking about it. it is just something that needs to happen. i dont know. sometimes i wish i could tell the future, but then what? everything in me and everything around me is telling me that i dont want to know. so what does that mean?